I used to think that I would never meet you. I think that’s what my anxiety and FOMO was. It was fear of missing out on you. Like you were out there and I was just one outing away from meeting you.
As time went on I became more and more anxious, doubting that I’d ever meet you. But today more than ever, I am certain that our paths will cross. It was a warm feeling of certainty that came over me as I spoke aloud the promise I will recount to you now.
I promise that when I meet you or recognize you, that I will love you and give everything that I can to make you better. Paulo Coelho said that loving and expecting love back is selfish. So I promise you that I will love you because the whole universe conspired to bring us together. I used to think that, “man 26 years and I still haven’t met her or recognized her.” But now I realize that everything I have done until now has put me one step, one day closer to you.
I am not sure where we will meet. It could be New York, São Paulo or P Wexfords. There is also a chance that we’ve already met, under platonic terms and that neither one of us, or maybe just me, recognized…us.
Whether we have yet to meet or have yet to recognize us, I promise to continue to work on being a better man, one that you will be proud to call your true love.
There is no point in looking back in regret at missed chances, or perceived missed chances. Because everything until now has put us in closer proximity.
This weekend got off to a crappy start as I was anxious to see this girl. I thought she may have been you, but I was wrong. She’s a good woman. But she wasn’t interested and this there could not have been an us. So in the wake of that, another “loss” in my increasingly long ledger, I should have been even more pessimistic at the chance for love.
But I have never felt closer to you. I have never been more certain of meeting you than I am today. And I know that if I continue to follow the signs on the road, that we will cross paths. Either as new friends, or as old friends getting reacquainted.
Until then, I’ll continue to work on being a better me. So that we can be a better we.
I am because we are.